That anguishing moment...

It happens, sometimes, that we wake up in the morning and inexplicably get perturbed by an anxious, worrisome thought. One feels reluctant to get out of the comforting bed, the much needed sensation of the time. It maybe an aftermath of a dreaded dream or because of the frequent and ineluctable trials of life.

Been there experienced that, many-a-times. But this one day, I tried expressing this moment in words. And this is it...

Look, as I lie on my bed, desiccated, feckless;

as the conflagrant Sun, almost at the apex, disseminates its powers to this world;

ricocheting, some piercing through my optics, the only part of me that's wide awake, sensate.

What's Love Got To Do With B-Wood Movies???

I AM BACK, I AM BACK…. Don’t get me wrong. I am not trying to index the saucy dance and produce half-hearted latkas and thumkas that KJo was able to pull off with such a (feminine) grace. Just that, it’s been a long time since I last posted on my blog. But as you know, the routine, time-worned life is so taxing and contains your free will K

Well, this one is something about what’s the discussed extensively in the Koffee show. The films. Yes, I have been a posting a lot of critical (seemingly harsh) opinions pertaining to the same on the social media. And being critical, I myself have been critiqued and reprimanded boldly (wrongly, many-a-times). But what goes unnoticed is that there are a lot of commendable productions that have hit the screens in recent times, which I have relished and praised. This, however, cannot enfeeble the fact that a myriad are, simply put, garbage material. And because of numerous reasons.

What pains me the most is that the fact that the base of almost all Hindi movie is a banal hetero love story, and the entire 120 minutes are wasted revolving around their over-convoluted, tortuous, however chimerical, daily routines. A real time simulacrum to this would be going to the same restaurant forever, with the same dishes being served. Where nothing but the ambiance and the pretty waiters’ new. Isn’t that revolting? Well, thus I say, so are most of the bollywood movies. Appeasing aberrations are always welcomed in life, but it does not seem to be the case here. Same old clichéd thing being thrown at us, almost like a rusty hacksaw being rubbed with the toothed edge against our imagination. Even worse, chances are that the foundation, scenes (or in nauseating cases, the entire dialogue set) are derived from some random/well known Hollywood, or maybe even movies from the same fraternity. I need not bother give examples to assert this. It feels like being cheated to pay for a movie which is not entirely original, whose essence one can absorb by watching the original one movie. These questions are virtuously reasonable. Having said that, I would definitely mention movies like Highway, Hasee toh Phasee, Gangs of Wasseypur, even low budget movies like Total Siyappa which have struck a different chord in the dilapidated B-town presentations, and save the day.

I am not trying to patronize, but take a look at THEIR movies. The Hollywood rather produces the stinking piles once in a blue moon’s time. Even their primary agenda is to stage and elicit love, but with a twist or in a multi-faceted manner. Recently, I watched the movie “The Book Thief”. Though based on a novel (a third of work already done there), the portrayal is something one may have never experienced. A variety of emotions, ranging from brotherly love, parental love, calf-love, apprehension, elation etc are so meticulously and fluently stitched together to produce an artistic master-piece to be adored by all. Others, like the movie “The Help”, are based on such trivial topics. Such a simple, yet affective movie recreating first-hand accounts of injustice during the apartheid reign.

To conclude, many may object to my opinions. I have personally faced strong opposition by people who take my impressions to heart, considering it as the penultimate judgment (maybe). Well, love me or hate me, I stick to my stance. It is debatable as to who is to blame more, the creators to make such films mostly out of greed or ignorance, or the audience for willingly paying for it (and the overpriced snacks) without giving it a thought. Though I believe there is great potential in the current and upcoming lot to revive the untended state of Hindi Cinema and bring it up to the mark, it needs to be channelized in an effective manner. After all, it’s one of the biggest film industry in this world J

Realizations, 5 Feet Under

The heading should have precisely been Realizations, 5 feet under water. Well, yes, it literally means so. Let me shoot straight to the core - the thought came to me while swimming underwater in our community swimming pool in this gorgeous township.

If you have swam before, you must have had a complete dip into the water at times. But have you ever experienced pensiveness down there? Just keep your eyes, ears and mind open and let the eternal thought process flow seamlessly through you while u are disconnected completely from the delusional world by the holier state of matter.

What do you see underwater? Tranquility. What do you hear under water? Serenity. This (I think) could be the most proximate emotion to statelessness that I have ever met, and highly susceptible to drowning too if prolonged (bad one, I know).

Well I did have an epiphany once. And what else could it be about, but the dreaded feeling of Fear (confused with apprehension a lot of time by a lot of people). No sir, apprehension is just another euphemistic term, it’s FEAR. And I had been burdened by this devil for a long time.

Let me tell you a story. Back in the new year’s eve of 1999, little Me was just 9 years. He went with his parents to enjoy the new year to a blooming resort in the famous city of Puri. One fine morning at the resort, he and his elder sister went into the resort’s pool. The boy was carried away to see so many people enjoying a nice swim, and took a dunk into the water himself. Little did he know that he drifted slowly to the deeper side of the pool, and when he could not hold his breath any longer, tried to come out.

He was panicking, and struggling for life, for air, for someone to get him the hell out of there. And his struggle for the surface rather countered his efforts.

Miraculously, a divine hand grabbed him and pulled him out only just in time to gasp in any state of matter, and luckily, it was the life giving air. 

He was saved by his sis that day. But never dared enter into water again (Hydrophobia?).

But later, under immense pressure of his awesome parents, he was compelled to learn the 2 most essential skills in life, Driving and Swimming. He was able to learn driving almost on his own in a matter of days after his 10^th in 2006, but tried hard to stay away from the pool. Later in 2009, after repetitive threats from his tangible Gods, he landed up taking membership at Kalinga Swimming Pool, BBSR in the summers along with his cousin brother.

          Kalinga Stadium Swimming Pool in Bhubaneswar

The horror was alive but time was finite and no options out. It was probably the most terrifying days of his life, the initial days of learning swimming. But with constant instigation, harsh aggravation and nurtured motivation, he was finally able to survive a lap in the Olympic standard isled arena. And swimming was no more a challenge for him.

Those were the days, and there’s today, I never forget to enjoy a quick dive into the pool whenever possible. However, the fear in me isn’t dead yet, oh no. It gives me chills till date to be in there. It’s like a 1/X function, never reaching 0 until infinity. Every time I go under water, I conquer a fraction of it, trying to overcome the emotion, step by step, closing the gap inch by inch, in a hope to befriend the deep.

But this devil friend of mine has helped me realize the constant fear that we live in our day-to-day lives. As soon as am off the blue, the residual terror makes me vulnerable to intense revelations, and I see the bigger horror picture that most of us overlook. The fear of life, the fear of love, fear of being lonely, fear of being deserted, disheartened, fear of performing let alone improving, fear of results, fear of conviction, the society, wealth, inability, incapability, incompatibility, incomprehensibility, unemployability, unreliability, deniability, vulnerability … X, Y & Z. And above all, fear of the future. And this makes me want to go back under, which surprisingly seems to be a better situation than this. Evasiveness? I thought so. I could only run, but how can I escape? So I realized, for me and for all, for now and forever, for here, there any everywhere – it’s time to rise [Mahindra], shine [Honda], and make the move my friend, make the move [Fiat].

Though that was a bad closure (apparently), it was never meant to be one. You see, fear has no conclusion, it is endlessly learnt, and incubated, but suppressible. Now that’s a closure. BTW, as I had said before, apprehension and fear, both the same to me. Read the second line of the previous paragraph replacing fear with apprehension, you will get what I mean…

A letter from a responsible Father to his son’s head master...

Here is a letter written by Abraham Lincoln to the head master of the school in which his son was studying,


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He will have to learn, I know, that all men are not just, all men are not true. But teach him also that for every scoundrel there is a hero: that for every selfish politician, there is a dedicated leader…

Teach him that for every enemy there is a friend. It will take time, I know a long time, but teach, if you can, that a dollar earned is of more value then five of found.

Teach him, to learn to lose…And also to enjoy winning. Steer him away from envy, if you can, teach in the secret of quiet laughter.

Teach him, if you can the wonder of books…But also given quiet time wonder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun, and flowers on the green hillside.

In a school teach him, it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat…

Teach him to have faith in his own idea, even if anyone else tell him they are wrong…

Teach him to be gentle with gentle people and tough with tough.

Teach him to listen to all men…But teach him also to filter all he hears on a screen of truth, and take only the good one that comes through.

Teach him, if you can, how to laugh when he is sad. Teach him there is no shame in tear.

Teach them to sell his brawn and brain to the highest bidder but never to put a prize tag on his heart and soul.

Teach him gently, but do not cuddle him, because only the test of fire makes the fine steel.

Teach him always to have sublime faith in himself because then he will always have some sublime faith in mankind.

This is a big order, but see what can you do… He is such a fine little fellow, my son!


Dad

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Now, this letter is very close to me as I had heard it while I was in my 9th class via one of my English teachers and had liked it very much. Its just today that incidentally, I got to read it after a long time. And I do feel the gravity of a responsible and affectionate father through Mr. Lincoln’s lines.

This letter is divided into many paragraphs, almost 12 of them in its body. Each expressing a different aspect of life. Each with a compelling power to think and to ponder upon. Each pregnant with meanings. Lines which reflect most of your own lives’. Ill try to explain what I conceived of them.

In the first two paragraphs, Mr.Lincoln speaks about his son to be taught to believe in truth and goodness. As he is a child, new to this world, innocent and truthful, he should be made aware of the fact that evil, atrocity, corruption and other unjust activities do exist in this world. People are there who carry out unjust activities on a selfish note. But he should have faith that even if evil exist in this world, there are angelic people too and this balance between the two kinds is the Law of this world. Indirectly somewhere, he tries to refer to the inner evil and the temptation towards bending down to it, which is prevenient in human blood (metaphorically speaking). But however overwhelming and attractive it may look, truth, goodness and honesty always prevails it. It may take a long time before he learns and experiences it himself. In this context, I must say, that I myself took a very long time to learn this, probably at the age of around 16 – 18 and I do believe that its better the earlier.

The 3^rd paragraph refers to “take as it is and learn from it” characteristic. He says that one should cherish and rejoice his success, but keeping in mind not to hurt others morale or be selfish in actions. He also says not be disheartened in the case of failure, but to learn from it and to respect the fair success of the competitors. You may ask a question here that “ What if the other person won on grounds of unfair means, through unjust recommendations, through bribery ??? “. You can find a reference in the 5^th paragraph, conveying that it is honourable to fail, than to win by cheating.

Mr. Lincoln also says that bookish knowledge does not complete our education. We also have to learn and appreciate Nature and its teachings and offerings to us. And its true, for example, modern aircrafts are being based on the principle on which birds are able to fly, underwater vessels are being closely related to aquatic animals’ movements. Nature has so much to offer to us and we should be greatful to It.

The next few paragraphs speak about the way he should behave in the society. The lines speak clearly for themselves and are very clear in their conveyance. The main part here is that one should be open to only the truth and should not believe in baseless rumours blindly however convincing they may seem to be. And even then, one should embrace the good part or the brighter side of it and disregard the rest. This is one of the key factors leading to sustained  happiness. It somewhere linked to the precautions taken following the first two paragraphs.

The line “Teach him, if you can, how to laugh when he is sad. Teach him there is no shame in tear.” is my favourite lines. It’s so easy to read and admire it, but it is much more difficult to practice it in real life. Don’t believe me? try it for yourself. How deeply grave a person becomes when he is sad, and how desperately a person tries to hold back his tears when he feels like to shed them away. It is because of the prevalent norm in the society and the feeling of embarrassment that has led to such consequences. But have you ever wondered, how relaxed you feel when you let your emotions out, when you speak away what’s on your mind, when you get even a spark of happiness in your sad times??? I have felt the soothing effect. These attributes are build up within the individual and is very difficult to impart. Maybe that’s why, Even Mr. Lincoln wonders whether the school can teach that stuff to his son.

The next lines are self-explanatory and refer to the characteristics of a good human being. Only thing, that he has used heavy and complex predicates.

He also speaks about the importance of making people learn and understand in a balanced way, i.e. one should be “gentle in teaching but not liberal” in the approach. This is valid to all fields of teachings and learnings. It has been carried out since the ancient times. A student should be fairly rewarded for good work but should also be punished equally for a blunder or indiscipline according to me. Also, a liberal attitude towards a ward often results into a spoilt youth. And if you look around you, probably could find some examples. Also, austere and demanding behaviour towards them may lead to a lot of complications in the child’s behaviour including display of rigidness.

Finally, Mr. Lincoln couldn’t hold his emotions any longer and finally confesses that its a big task for both the headmaster and for his son to go through it. He knows it will be a difficult path for his son to follow, but he has no other option. And like any other parent, has faith in his child. And signs the letter as a “father “ (Dad) rather than Abraham Lincoln, President of United States. A thing to be noted.

It is the beauty and sincerity of the words that one needs to imbibe from this letter, rather than praising it for its sublimate characteristic. He has displayed the true will and the rightful responsibility of a caring and affectionate father towards his son.

The term education may have been used by one many a times. But very few people know its core meaning. Most of the time, it is misperceived as studies or knowledge or any other tangible means that assures a settled life. If you would ask any school student, Why they go to school, almost all would say to study. Maybe, even the parents send their children for the same reason. Ask yourself, or imagine yourself as a school student, the same question, probably the answer remains the same. How rarely do u find a student realizing the value and importance of education. Blame the society, blame the competition, but ultimately, its about you and you only who is responsible how you mature yourself. However big and heavy the books become as time passes in schools, let them advance the courses, the education still remains incomplete without the aspects of teachings brought about in the given letter.

Thus, what I feel, is  that Mr. Lincoln has described in his letter, a complete and ideal model of a complete, comprehensive and fruitful education.
 

He didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.  ~ Clarence Budington Kelland on his father

 

An old SMS post

Just a few days back, I was browsing through my awesome phone pointlessly to kill some precious time. And then, I came across a SMS that was saved in my drafts folder for a long time now. It was a short read I had made up probably about 2 years ago while traveling in a train from....., i don't know, some place to another. It was a description of something I saw in the compartment and what philosophical inference popped up in my mind that I wanted to jot it down to preserve that momentary experience. So here is the exact text that is still saved in my mobile phone that I want to share- 

Traveling in d train, I saw 2 kids well below teenage.

One carrying a basket, about 2ice his own size, selling veg. chat n shouting loud enough 2 catch one's attention, n a smile gentle enough 2 comfort d customers and travelers around. Master of his own business...

The other, healthier one out of d 2, but waking sleepy people up, asking for money in probably an expressionless and ignorant manner, with no sign of innocence nor regret.

I blame none nor do I sympathize anyone, but would definitely say..........

This is the difference between earning for living, and living for earning.

THE IRONICAL WEATHER – a poem

A blog that I had written long ago but never publicized it...

Just yesterday, 24th of April 2010, I was coming back after surviving a very tensive situation. I had just given a group viva and was walking back to the hostel on the pathway. It was a viva on a design assignment that I and my group members had done for the partial fulfillment of the the course called Microprocessor Programming and Interfacing. Though the assignment was quite a fun to do, the viva was equally not. It was about 6 o' clock when the weather suddenly changed. Black clouds, cool wind, dusky weather, it was the kind of weather LOVED by me. For the last 2 months, I have been pinned by the intense heat and humidity of the typical Goan summer without a respite. And here it was, what I had long wished for… As i enjoyed the weather, a small poem began to evolve in my mind… I further extended it later just to satisfy my urge and enjoy the weather to the fullest. So here it is,

THE IRONOCAL WEATHER

Oh what a pleasent weather

Oh what a cool sway

Mesmerism at its crest

While i sleepwalk through my way

.

“Beware”, says the cloud,

“I am here for you to scare”

He roars a thunder loud

And says “Bad times are there”

.

I said “Halt, ohh mighty cloud

What wrong have i done”

He roars back aloud,

And says “The sin is your fun”

.

He says “Ohh my petty child

Your bygone past is such

Amusements should have been mild

But you have had too much”

.

“You havent fared at all,

for the last 2 years or so

You are about to fall

Cause your scores are very low”

.

“Its better if you know,

Now its time to moil.

Your burdens you have to tow

Harder each day to toil”

.

I said “oh my saviour cloud

I have the courage to cope”

Infront of him I bowed

And said…

“Just give me a ray of hope”

Get a life, Get educated...

Oh, I so love Sunday afternoons. A week of ‘life and work’ (antonyms in my dictionary) has just passed by, and its time to relax so as to be ready for the coming week. But, I rather thought of writing a blog.

 

While I was enjoying Miley Cyrus’  music video “Can’t be tamed “ (she looks damn good in that music video, at-least), I recalled one of her interviews on a TV channel long ago. She was 15 then and was in high-school. So the reporter asked her how she managed her school work along with the tight TV shoot schedules and singing and concerts and what not. She replied that it does become very hectic sometimes and she often has to bunk classes, skip exams. Besides, when she’s short on preparation for exams(which is very often, Miley exclaims), she takes it at home, and maybe even copies the answers. Now surely that seems to be an unsystematic method of high school studies. Isn’t it an inappropriate attitude towards primal education? Where does the learning process fit in here? It was shocking to hear this, maybe because I was also in high-school then. Even though she lacks time due to her stardom, I still won’t advocate her neglecting school work to such an extent.

This is not the only instance I have come across of an irrational attitude of some well celebrated people towards education. Apart from many Hollywood celebrities, most of our own Bollywood studs have neglected their studies during their tender age. There was this one time in “Koffee with Karan” talk show when Ranbir Kapoor and Imran Khan both were invited for a chat. And when asked about their academic life, they frankly (rather mockingly) told that they BOTH had secured some 50 odd percent overall in their 10^th ICSE board exams. And they didn’t even care about it. I thought, hadn’t  it been for the guarding hands of their influential family members backing them, they would have been no where. I mean, I don’t deny them being talented (or are they!!!), but no one, and I mean no one, who gets such an opportunity to complete their studies should neglect it in the first place. BTW, they couldn’t figure out but even Karan Johar (himself a graduate form the famous HR college) was deriding them of this fact.

Ours is a country which gives much importance to education. And education is the only way to have a secured life, if in India. No one can deny this. Like one of my teacher (Ninji ma’am) used to say “Yeh America nahin hai jahaan sadakchaap anguthachaap bhi carorepati ban jaata hai. Yahaan janam liya hai toh mehnat se padhna padega “. And in one sense, its rather true. People would definitely give you examples of eminent figures like Bill Gates, Bryan Adams, Ricard Branson, Mukesh Ambani and so on, who dropped out of college/high-school but still achieved success in their respective fields. But even though they may shine like the sun, they have dark spots on them. And definitely, it’s a discredit on their part.

But, even though this deficiency is concealed under their glare of stardom, it does become visible in awkward situations. And in that stage, they do have to face the humiliation. One instance, that I can recall, was this episode of Farah Khan’s “ Tere Mere Beach Mein ” with Asin and Deepika Padukone. Farah revealed that Asin was a brilliant student in her school days and also was interested in the field of financial management. Since she was in her 9^th class, she sometimes used to accompany her industrialist father into boardroom meetings and was interested in the trade of financial planning and accounting. And just through learning by participating, she was able to help her father in that department. She also is a B.A. graduate and always wanted to be a professional and taking up acting was just an accidental turn in her life. While all this was being said about Asin, Deepika was quietly listening to her with a numb face when Farah finally turned towards her and disclosed that Deepika was not even a graduate till date. She was trying to do some random correspondence graduation course from some random college but wasn’t able to pass the examinations for the last 6 years. Deepika couldn’t take this abashment and she started blabbering and giving random excuses to escape the humiliation. Throughout the show, she looked quite disconcerted. Since that day, my respect for this beauty decreased (~\/~) and whenever I see her on TV, I say “She is not even a graduate“. And this thought by itself is a disgrace to the person whom it is aimed at. Secondly, getting offers in films is not a permanent matter and film industry is not a secured field. What if she finds herself without any roles, left out to live on her own one day?

On the other side, there are quite a few personalities who have fared well in their respective fields of expertise besides fulfilling their duty of completing their education, and completing it excellently. Take Shah Rukh Khan for example. Who doesn’t know him, the king of Indian cinema. During his school days, he was accomplished in both sports, drama, and academics. He even had won the best student award of his batch. Others include Vidya Balan (who has multiple degrees to her name J), Preity Zinta (psychology grad), Bipasha Basu (MBBS),  Anil Kumble, Sania Mirza, etc. who are a few of the very few people in the limelight.

I am not criticizing any particular individual for choosing what they have taken up, but am rather not appreciating the ignorance that they have shown towards the basic amenities that they lack in life. My conclusion is not that one shouldn’t go into the film or sports line or what-so-ever, I just wanna say that - first be eligible to support yourself, then take your own personal decisions. In total, one should hold the charisma and the confidence to win the world which one can avail through education. As I always say, “I would rather be happy to open a paan shop in Orissa near my home and stay happily forever in that business, but even for that, I need to be eligible for doing so by getting a proper MBA/MBM degree, so that no one dare point out a finger at me.”